adventures in cooking
by Phoenix Satori
Summary: 'I arrived just as Kagami-kun was threatening Aomine-kun with a knife,' Kuroko explains. ::aomomo::


inspired by the #aomomomonth prompt: 'domestic.'

part two probably coming sometime maybe eventually.

::post-Winter Cup, eventual spoilers for end of manga.::

[fujitada is the tits, yo. and ahomine's aaaaall his.]

* * *

One crisp, winter morning in late January, on their daily walk to school, Satsuki tells him she's spending Saturday at Kagami's place. She reports this to Daiki matter-of-factly, one item among the many she recites when he offhandedly asks if she has plans for the long weekend. Like it's perfectly normal for her to pal around with his arch rival in her spare time.

Peevishly, "Wh_a_t the hell_ for_?" She blinks up at him in bewilderment. Then she frowns.

"I told you, it's her birthday! And _what_ is with the sudden hostility toward Granny?" It's his turn to look confused. It takes him a long, slow moment to realize she must've continued listing through her itinerary while he'd been preoccupied visualizing himself, repeatedly punching Seirin's ace right in his stupid fucking eyebrows. At any rate, he does finally figure out she's moved on to her plans for Sunday already, since even as Satsuki mentions her grandma's birthday, he's remembering he's now only got two days left to find a suitable gift before the Wrath of Mom descends upon him.

"That's not—I'm _talking_ about you 'spending Saturday' with _Kagami._" She stares.

"Oh."

"Just '_oh_?'" Daiki sneers, wondering if he's somehow missing something.

"What's wrong with Kagamin?"

"What's wrong with Kaga_moron _is," he grabs for the first thing his brain can crank out, "-he's the enemy!" The logic's kinda flimsy, he thinks, but he can work with it. Too late to change his answer now anyway. "You already decided to come to Touou, Satsuki. No take-backs, dammit." He comes to a steady halt when she rounds on him and playfully curls her fingers in the long, navy tails of his scarf. She's wearing the biggest, brightest, stupidest smile he's ever seen.

Eyes twinkling with a manic light, "Awww, you _do_ love me after all!" And that's rattling enough _without_ what she does next, which is to lean in abruptly and press him into a hug right here in full view of the whole fucking neighborhood. For the hundred-millionth time he wills himself to forget that Satsuki's a girl, even as soft, compelling evidence to the contrary presses into his chest.

Brow twitching in aggravation, "_Oi_, don't just go grabbing people all the time."

Satsuki disengages with a wink and leads off again with a noticeable bounce in her tread. He falls back into step beside her automatically, if also irritatedly. She ignores his deliberately sour expression and picks up the conversation precisely where they'd left it half a moment prior.

"I'm glad to know you appreciate the many sacrifices I've made on your behalf, Dai-chan," he pulls a face, "but you don't have to get so worked up. It's not that big a deal." He's not convinced that it isn't, and the look he gives her reflects as much. She rolls her eyes. "Oh, for crying out loud. I'm not _defecting_, we're just _cooking_."

…wait, _what_?

Incredulously, "_…huh_?" She reaches over to give his chest a sound 'thwack!'

"Seriously, were you not listening at _all_? I _just told you_, Kagamin's teaching me to make a few of Tetsu-kun's favorite dishes, so I can, maybe…m-make dinner for him next weekend."

Oh. _Ohhh_. Of course this is about Tetsu. Really should'a seen that one coming.

Well, whether or not Kagami can be trusted alone with his manager, he knows there'll be no changing her mind or getting her to back down, not now that he knows this whole weird, crossing-enemy-lines scenario's for Tetsu's benefit.

Sighing in resignation, "C'mon, Satsuki, it's the little guy's birthday next weekend. You're supposed to give him a gift, not food-poisoning." Years of anticipating and avoiding her slap-happy temper enable him to easily dodge the swat she aims at his upper arm.

"I'm not _that bad_!"

Ignoring her, "On the other hand, if Kagami's gonna be your guinea pig…" He holds a contemplative finger to his chin, picturing the redhead draped over the toilet, in agony for hours and hours on end. It's a surprisingly uplifting image. "In that case, go for it." He pointedly doesn't see the pouting hurt flash across her face.

"Mou, stop visualizing terrible things!" It doesn't even faze him anymore, the way she reaches into his brain and pulls out the very thing he's thinking.

By way of mild repentance, Daiki leans over slightly and gently nudges her elbow with his own, reopening the subject.

"What the hell does that guy even _know _about cooking? Idiot's got basketball on the brain 24/7." She cuts him a look that very clearly says, '**_Seriously_**_?_' Which, yeah, okay, he maybe deserves.

"I'll have you know, supposedly he's really, really good! Tetsu-kun's always raving about the food Kagamin makes." The way she says it makes it sound as though she's been talking with Tetsu a lot. Regularly, even. This probably shouldn't surprise him; _all_ of the Miracles've been keeping in better touch since the Winter Cup. Hell, even Akashi checks in now, from time to time, in his own clinically cool and vaguely sinister kinda way. "Guess that's what happens when you live on your own, huh? You get super self-sufficient and mature." Daiki's pretty sure Kagami's neither of those things. But he's willing to silently concede the claim in light of the compelling point of interest his stomach raises: _free food_.

Eventually, just like back at Teikou when she'd been kicked out of her class's school festival theme café,* Kagami will be forced to evacuate her from the kitchen and take over, or watch in horror as Satsuki somehow manages to burn down the entire apartment complex. And if Tetsu praises Bakagami's cooking so damn highly, why _shouldn_'t he try some? Bastard owes him for the sneakers anyway.

As disinterestedly as possible, "So what time's this disaster set to start?" She glances over at him with knowing consternation.

"No way, Dai-chan. You are _not allowed to come over_. You'll just rile each other up and the whole thing'll devolve into a basketball match that lasts for hours, and my plans will be ruined!" He pretends ignorance of these accusations, shrugging to indicate he could actually care less, that he's just making idle chatter.

"I've got zero interest in spending time with Fork Brows off the court, Satsuki. No food could possibly be worth the headache." She clearly doubts this assurance –and rightfully so, since he can't think of a single situation where free food _hadn't_ been worth whatever species of inconvenience comes along with it—but she drops the matter all the same. For his part, he decides it doesn't really matter if she's willing to tell him or not. He can always just charm the information out of her mom later.

And he means to.

* * *

*referring to Actual Events from the second Kurobasu Replace Novel, chapter one. (_mocopersonal . tumblr post / 33425695123_) - [remove spaces]

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i love these two muchomuchomuy.

AKASHI, THO.

**_/"kneel."/_**

*obsessed*

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chapter two: kagami n' satsuki gossip, aomine plays the opposite game, and kuroko invisibles his way into kagami's apartment to get his mooch on.


End file.
